I picked up your paw casting today

Dear Gunner,

Today I drove to Brandon to pick up your paw casting. It was the final piece to your passing. Our memorial will be private,I will honor you in style.

I packed a small suitcase with your picture in in and some clothes.  I didn't think I could go back home right now. I cleaned the house, did my errands and left a note.  As I drove I kept singing because if I allowed myself to think, I would cry and I didn't want to cry.  If I cry, I stop breathing because my cries are like sobs. Our neighbor thinks it's disturbing. I think he is an asshole for saying it, so we are even.

I was met by a very lovely lady who hand delivered your paw print to me. We had spoke in the past and she was very lovely. She was very sorry and I expressed my dislike for the ER vet. I praised Dr. E for her help and care, but thought the ER vet was horrible.

We chatted a minute and I knew it was time to get in the car. I was calm and steady, I texted Aunt Ronnie and asked if she was free.  She immediately replied yes and I called. She knew instinctively I needed her to talk me through the drive home. We chatted about you and then Politics, and the weather, the a puppy bulldog and life. She stayed by myside as I drove back home.

Once inside I threw the note away and unpacked. I know Maggie needs me and I know I will be ok, somehow, some way you will make me a better person. The Wrinkle Ranch will continue, our No Bulldog left behind will continue, without even batting an eye, my love for you will continue.

Tomorrow is Mother's day - which has been a huge day for you and I.  I remember you taking me to brunch at the Bistro in Clearwater and we sat on the patio. We were dressed up and you stole the hearts of everyone who passed by us. You were the best dressed man there. Tomorrow I will make breakfast for Mags and I will think of how you would jump in my bed,give me budgies and step on my boobs. I miss you so much.

Love to the moon and back.

Dear Gunner

Dear Gunner,

Today has been a rough one. Many of your friends and pawrents have sent some of the most gorgeous memorial presents, flowers, and cards. I do not feel worthy of them. I sit and cry. You are all over this house, I cannot go in one room and not see you there.  I needed a place to put all the beautiful gifts, so I picked your spot at the front door, your favorite place, where I can go and pray and see you.

Each card I open, I look for you to read it to you, that was our thing.  You would smell the card and then cock your head to the side as if to say, proceed.  I miss you more today than yesterday. No one told me this was going to be so hard, I have lost many people in my life, nothing compares to you leaving me.  I am so sorry for not protecting you better.

The Bulldog and Breakfast is not the same without you. I wake up thinking I hearing you snore, I jump up tonight hoping this has all been a bad dream. It's been a bad reality. I blast our favorite play list, I dance with one of your stuffies. I can still feel you nuzzle my ear.

It's going to be a long road for me, I want to hold you again, I want you to look at me with those huge brown eyes and make this all go away. So much pressure for a bulldog, it was a job you handled with ease. I miss you GunnerButter.

Time is not healing all wounds...

It has been 8 days since Gunner left me. I cannot put into words the void and hurt I feel. My emotions go in waves. I have lost a few friendships for saying "he was just a dog"... The loss is real and painful.

Making arrangements, cancelling insurance, processing invoices, and what to do with the house. I make no bones about this, every room in my house was Gunner.

Before I go on, I will tell you I have Gunner's littermate sister Maggie, she is wonderful and sweet. Probably the perfect bulldog if you must know. She was my sister's, when my sister died I inherited her. They were side by side buddies for the last 5 years.

It is not the same with Maggie. Gunner was a bigger than life presence. Which is funny because I just had someone say that about me as well.

What do I do with the crates strategically arranged in the house? Gunner loved his crates. He liked to nap in his room in his crate often. He slept in a crate at night (his choice). That's just the start of it. He has furniture of his own, beds, photos, toys, clothes, oh my heavens he has clothes. I have decided to make shadow boxes of Gunner. One will have his Charlie Brown sweater which was his absolute favorite sweater to wear. He would pick it out of the drawer when I was getting him dressed when the cold weather came.

We are so blessed with all our friends. Our OG gang has really been amazing. Miss Dixie and Sugar Lump and Dooley family has been a rock for me. Coach and Mac's parents have been a constant support and a willing ear to listen to my crying. Cleo's family has been so sweet and caring about us, and Bubbles Mom has been just a blessing. There are so many others that have touched our hearts. Emmy and Luna Bean's Mom helped guide me with Gunner's originally planned surgery. Star has been so caring. Most of the Original #StudClub have reached out to me, it's been a great feeling knowing how much Gunner meant to all of you.

I have a memorial service planned for Gunner, judge me not, he deserves this. I hope to continue to honor Gunner with our Roscoe's Rascals No Bulldog Left Behind Angel Fund. We donate hundreds of dog food to rescues and make Angel fund donations to help with vet costs.

I want to personally say that if you met Gunner you loved him. He made you love him, he was the light in the day when it all looked bleak.

I have sorted out some of his clothes, I am really undecided what to do with them. I cannot imagine another dog wearing his clothes. We shall see what the future holds. Please do not forget Gunner, he has never forgotten any of you.

My heart is broken

Gunner has passed away. Those words cut like a knife. Gunner MacGyver - Lyerly's This Guns For Hire. Love of my life.

Gunner has had a fairly illness free life, he had a few Upper Respiratory infections and a bit of a skin issue in his wee early days.

We were blessed with 8 years and 3 months with him. In the beginning with Gunner it was a challenge, he was not the fat happy bulldog that would sleep. Oh no, he was 100mph sun up to sun down. He needed to be entertained. I took him to music appreciation classes, play dates, meetups, lunch at Bistro's, a few road trips and taught him how to order room service. He was my life. Being divorced wasn't lonely for me, Gunner was a constant companion that loved watching Hallmark Movies with me. He was not happy unless he was within zero space from you. He would lay on my lap and hold my hand. However, everyone wanted to be near Gunner so his Dad was never far from us, or anyone else who wanted to be around.

He was spoiled, no doubt. I like to say Well Loved. Anyone who spoke to me knew about Gunner and then eventually Maggie when she came to live with us. Gunner has more clothes than most humans. I can guarantee more know about Gunner than my personal life. I had a rule; to love me was to love him. We are a packaged deal. He had a Manny. A Male Nanny. All of our lives are shook right now.

His final days haunt me. these past two days I wake up screaming and crying. I miss going into the bathroom and closing the door most way and having him pop his head in as if to say "haha you can't keep me out" I never wanted to, I just liked the game of it. I remember when he was a about a year old he started coming to the back bathroom and poking his head in the walk in shower. He would stand there as if to say "whatcha doing"?

Gunner has his own 200 square foot room. He has his own furniture and this is his house, I just get to stay here. What do I do with this? I have had a few conversations with the Vet's he treated with and the surgeon after he passed away. None of this makes sense to me,  I will never come to grips with it.

About three months ago, Gunner and I had a talk. We discussed this upcoming summer of going to meet his girlfriend Cleopatra. We wanted to attend the Bully Bash so badly, but his paw was giving him some issue. He was a constant licker. I commissioned a grooms tuxedo for him and a bridal gown for Cleo; I planned to surprise everyone with a wedding. It was a little secret him and I worked on. He would watch me sketch and send the drawings. I started making him cuff links and corsages for the girls. He would pick out the fabrics we were looking at. He only liked certain fabrics so I wanted to make sure he liked it. Sadly he isn't going to be able to attend.

Gunner was not just a dog, he was my life. When I didn't want to get out of bed because I was sad, he was my reason. I never experienced depression, I was just hopeless. He changed my life in ways I cannot even tell you.

Every night I would read him a story and we would watch bulldog videos. He loved mail. His first Valentine was from a human sister of a bulldog (Collins). He loved it. He would sniff it all the time. Gunner was preceptive. If I put on makeup or a nice outfit he would come right over to me and sniff my neck. He was the first to notice a new hair cut. -- Go ahead think I am crazy... If I put lipstick on, he would nuzzle my neck. He loved perfume.

If he ever learned to talk, I would be up shits creek without a paddle. He knew EVERY single secret I had. My little man was my hero. He protected me when I needed it, he loved me when I needed it and he entertained me when I needed it.

I have so many memories of Gunner and I plan to write them as I am doing now. This is for me, and no one else.

xoxox G Mommy misses you.

it's BullAWeen time... Halloween Costume Party October 27, 2018

Friends it's that time of year... Pumpkin spice, orange and yellow everywhere and HALLOWEEN is right around the corner. 

We are planning a Halloween (BullAWeen) Costume Party 

We have a great impartial Judge and we will have treats and snacks for everyone... 

Prizes for the best costume and lots of fun!! Join us please. 

Any questions- email at GunnerThisGunsForHire@gmail.com 

Georgia Love Richey - RIP 11-13-2003 - 10-06-2016

So here are a few of my favorite pictures...

So here we go... Meeting Georgia and her family was one of the highlights of Twitter. Each and every turn, if something was going on, they were there with a kind word. I believe Georgia is the OG of strollers. After she had one, everyone got one. Personally for me, her bottom teeth were my favorite sight each day. I loved the family bond and when rescues stopped to visit, Georgia was as sweet as can be. The day Emmy came to town, I wondered if Georgia would lose her spunk. With each story of Emmy and her wayward ways, Georgia made you feel apart of the learning curve of a pipsqueak puppy. One night we were up very late, hadn't had any sleep and couldn't fall asleep, we started looking at twitter friends pictures and writing little things about them so we would have a memory of all our funny stories. Unfortunately we lost our writings, with 2 exceptions... One was about Georgia. Always a cheerful good morning, always that toothy smile that makes me want to squeeze and kiss her. Often I forget Georgia has 4 legs and cannot vocalize, but I am sure if she could she would say, #GOYA and exercise. I loved that about Georgia, always there smiling. Today is not a day I ever want to relive. I did not meet her face to face, I did not call her on the phone, we did not share an ibone session, but we shared in admiration of our love for Georgia. I wish we had more time, we were going to hand deliver her birthday present. I felt this would be my chance to say thank you and see her teeth in person. That didn't happen... We love you Georgia and want you to know we want to be as good as you! Fly free at the bridge and plenty of kisses for you!

Finally we are back...

We have gone through quite an ordeal with our computers. Mommy got that very bad virus that they demand money for. We lost all kinds of things. First and foremost my baby pictures. My friends emails and mailing lists. My whole world of social media came crashing down. We have been trying to get passwords to things like our blog, our website, our life links.

For the last five months it's been a living hell. Lost the best computer system, had to buy all new computers, lost thumb and external drives. most of all had our bank accounts drained. We are finally on the mend, but not 100%. We have missed you all and thankfully one small saving act has allowed my Mom to save a few pictures, TWITTER keeps a lot of them.

We are more appreciative for our friends past and present.

Much love,

Gunner